March 31, 2021 by Klaus Crow
photo by Ivan Zuber
A few days ago I saw a great singer songwriter on TV. He was playing his repertoire, talking about his life and all the songs he had written over the years.
I was all ears and loved every minute of it. While listening to his wisdom and beautiful melodies something struck me.
It was one of those wake up calls when suddenly you can see things very clearly. I had a strong urge to change some things in my life again. I needed to get my priorities straight and get back to what is most important in my life. I have done so.
Sometimes with everything that life has to offer, you get lost or off track. You are distracted or tempted by things that look interesting and sound amazing at first. Before you know it you are in over your head. You taste, but end up tasting too much of it. It does not fulfill you anymore.
It does no longer match your identity. Times are changing and so are you. You grow, experience, learn many different things that can change the course of your life. You might become confused about your current situation. You might doubt your job, your lifestyle, the way you play guitar, the band you play in, the music you play, your role as a musician, what you need to practice, how you spend and manage your time, what you want in your life and what you don’t want in your life.
You might ask yourself: Is this the right path? Is this the way I want to continue? You can’t figure it out and you are too afraid to let go of it. You might have started out with something that has grown and grown bigger. You are attached to it for whatever reason. The bigness of it all will make it seem more important than it really is and that can be quite misleading.
The time you invest in something creates a certain value but at the same time it can become a burden.
Maybe your values have changed over time, you might have new dreams or you wanna change or adjust your lifestyle. Maybe you underestimated or overestimated the choices you made or you are just being busy without any sense.
When you find yourself in a situation like this, it can be difficult to find a real honest answer and make a decision about it.
What you should do is observe and listen. Open your ears and eyes to whatever is out there. Pick up signs. Be open to whatever comes your way. There will be a moment when somebody will tell you a story, you hear a song on the radio, you watch a documentary or something in real life will happen that leaves you with a clear answer. At that very moment you will know what to do.
Here are some ways to speed up that process, get you back on track and continue to being your true self:
1. Read stories written by people or about people who inspire you. Read books, blogs and magazines you love. Reading will expand your horizon. It can help you find a way out.
2. Listen to people who can be objective. People who are wise or honest in your opinion.
3. Do something different from what you normally do. Try it for a day, a weekend or a week.
4. Take a long walk outside where it’s quiet. Alone! ( Not to the mall. )
5. Meditate or take some time to relax. ( e.g. drinking tea without the distractions)
6. Write down your questions and worries on paper. Write down pros en cons. Write down your wishes and dreams on 43things.com Write down anything that comes to mind. When you write, things often become clearer.
7. Socialize with friends, family and strangers.
8. Be honest to yourself and others. Let go of your ego. Your ego will stand in the way of beautiful things, improvement and real growth.
9. Play or listen to the music you truly love.
10. Stop worrying about what others may think of you. Don’t let others decide for you.
11. Be fearless, be bold, be courageous to do what you think is best for you.
12. Don’t follow, but lead your own way. Even if it is a lonely way. It will be rewarding.
13. Make a decision. Let it cool for a week or 2. If you still feel it is the right thing to do, act on it.
14. If you make a mistake, learn from it. Don’t regret it. Move on. Better things will come. Every mistake is a lesson learned.
Sometimes you have to do what you don’t like to get to where you want to be. – Tori Amos
Hey Klaus,
It’s really weird that when ever i come to fork in my life I come here for answers and always seem to find it. I somehow can relate to your posts cause I want to do what you do. Here’s my question..I have started so many plans with different circles of people that are for the love of music and art apart from “having” to run my own web agency with my older brothers which is great fun and I’m enjoying it thoroughly which also means that most of money is also being spent on practice, studio-rental, Living expenses & leisure activities.An have Zero Savings..Zip! I’m 28 today and want to find a wife and start my own separate life on my own in a couple of years, but i have family obligations and apparently don’t have a good argument based on the circumstances to want to lead my own life and to be honest I’m not even sure how i will go about it even if they say “Fine Go”…What would you do? Thanks for the post again!
Hi Aum,
It’s always difficult to find the right answer for your particular situation from the outside, but having said that
You have to set some priorities and make a list of one or two things in your life that matters most to you.
You have to realize that one day when you will be looking back on your life you can say you have tried your best to realize your dreams and pursued your passions.
Be sure that what you are doing or what you want to be doing is the thing you love most
and yes it’s okay to change your mind along the way. That’s part of becoming older and wiser.
Be kind, be gentle, be understanding but don’t let others decide for you. This is your life!
I would say make a start today.
Write down what you feel, what you want and be honest to yourself.
Begin with one small step towards the things you want most.
Everyday one little step at a time and experience what it feels like.
Once you begin your heart will lead the way. The most important thing is to listen to your heart.
The most honest and true path is not always the most easiest one at first, but it will feel good from deep inside.
Kind regards,
Klaus Crow
Thanks!
hello klaus..
your website is amazing and really helpful. you are doing a great job. you are really inspirational too. after reading some of your blogs i think you might help me with my situation as i am finding no one to tell or make them comprehend. i live in india. i am 24. i have a govt job. i am learning guitar since 2 years. guitar is my dream. i always think that i should have started earlier but due to my studies and career i couldnt. but now my parents are forcing me to go for a more higher quality job. but i know, then i wont have time for guitar and would have to move out of my home town. now i have a decent job, i get time for guitar but due to this forcing of parents a lot of things go through my mind like can i ever become good at guitar? will in future i regret not opting for better job? etc etc. i cant explain to my parents that the job i am doing is enough for me and its best as i get ample time to plan for guitar. i am confused. you may well understand my situation. please help sir. will be eagerly waiting for your response.
a fan of yours
Souvik