May 15, 2019 by Klaus Crow
Photo by Aimee Heart
A few weeks ago a great bass player asked me to join him and two other muscians that I really admire to start a new band.
I was ecstatic. I said: “Yes of course, great, awesome!”
We met a few days later to talk about stuff like what kind of music we wanted to play, what our goal would be, how many gigs we wanted to play, where to rehearse, etc.
I was thrilled, but at the same time confused. I was in a dilemma.
The picture of me playing with those great musicians playing great music was awesome, but somehow it didn’t feel right. I was doubting and I was restless. I decided to let it rest for a while and leave it up to the universe.
I went through all the different scenarios in my head, the pros and cons and I still couldn’t figure it out.
I called him back and we talked for an hour and a half figuring out what was troubling me and we had a really great conversation. It helped me a lot, but still I couldn’t decide what to do.
I threw the dilemma back into the sky and after a week of going back and forth the answer slowly grew on me. In fact, I think the answer was already clear from the beginning, but I just didn’t want to see it or I didn’t want to believe it.
This wasn’t the time for me to start a new band.
I was in another stage of life. I realized I was already living a happy life. I was following my passions and busy with new goals.
Being a 33 year old guitar player and songwriter who had just took a break from his own band a year ago, playing in bands nonstop from the age of 13 and professionally from age 21, now a self employed guitar teacher working from home, a husband and dad of two kids with the ages of 2 and 5 months old, writer of two blogs (Guitar Habits and Simplify Your Day), still improving my guitar playing on a regurarly basis, a lifehacker trying to simplify, enjoying the freedom and good life it was clear that I already knew the answer.
Sometimes it’s good to take a break from playing gigs or other musical projects in your life. It’s good to be honest with yourself.
Do you feel you’re in some kind of musical dilemma, here are the keys that made it 100% clear to me:
Keep your heart above your head.
Listen to your heart when your mind leaves you confused.
If you feel fear but your heart is in love, listen to your heart. If your mind is in doubt but your heart is sure, listen to your heart.
Note: Be sure who is telling you what. Sometimes you think your heart is speaking but it might as well be your mind. Feel what is real.
Talk
Talk to people who really know you but at the same time can have an objective opinion. Don’t let them convince you, just let them talk and hear them out. Call every person you feel you need to talk to.
Leave it alone
Let your dilemma or questions rest for a while. Just leave it up to the universe. You will get an answer in time if you’ll trust on it, but be patient.
The little voice behind the little voice
A good friend of mine told me this once and it helped me out many times.
For good reasons we listen to the little voice inside our heads for a true answer. But sometimes we’re still not sure if this little voice speaks the truth. At this point listen to the little voice behind the little voice in the back of your head to find out the real truth. Try it out!
Do what you wanna do, be who you wanna be.
Do what you really want. Don’t be a fake. Don’t be someone who others want or expect you to be. Don’t try to compete. Live your own true life. Find your own path.
Play, write, sing and perform the music you love even if it is not considered as cool. There is an audience for everyone out there.
Live your life as a musician in your own way. Life changes and so do you. You might not want to be the things you wanted when you were younger. Let go of entrenched views.
You grow, you become wiser (hopefully), your taste becomes more varied, your view on life expands and life circumstances change. That’s a good thing.
Live the life you wanna live now and know you can change it anytime.
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. – Lao Tzu
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Those are nice words for a 33 year old guitarplayer.
And you are absolutely right about the voice behind the voice, which is often to faint to “hear” inside your head. You should make a song out of that story,hahaha.
Anyway, nice article from the bottom of your heart. Keep up the good work. And indeed as you invited me to this site: I like it!
Ralf.
Yes indeed I invited you via Facebook Thanks for being a facebook friend.
I love the voice behind the voice. It really speaks the truth if you listen carefully. It’s a great tool when you’re in doubt.
See you around Ralf
Klaus Crow
Great advice for anyone, and especially for artists of all media.
I think we are all happier and live better lives when we learn to tune our ears to the voice behind the voice within.
Thanks
Hi Cat,
Right on! :-)
Klaus
Hi Torgeir,
Who knows. :)
who is still awake?
I am not shy enough to say that my name is Kathrin.
Ist da draussen noch ein Mensch wach ?
Oh Himmel ,verflixt.
I am able to answer in english ,german ,spanish,french or latin ,but the last three are a bit rusty …so to say:).
I think this is a really good website. I think its very honest in its approach. And its not glitzy or loud and I like it alot. I wanted to ask for advice. I used to play guitar all the time. I wanted to play pieces of music like Bachs toccata and Fugue . I started and played 4 hours a day for about two years.I never really mastered any of the pieces I was trying to play. Then I gave up playing and then I started again and learned to play along with backing tracks.This was easier and I found my timing really improved. Thing is I got busy with other things and I dont play much anymore. Anyway I obviously would like to start playing again but dont know where to start. I was in to metal and people like Malmsteen but I dont think playing a million miles a minute sounds good anymore. I actually prefer his slower stuff. Anyway Do you know how I might rekindle that magic?
Hi Mark,
Just start with a song you like and a song you can handle without any expectations. Once you start practicing, playing and listening inspiration will come to you. You’ll know what to practice next.
Just follow your heart, but take it slow, small steps, just enjoy the process without thinking to far ahead. Just play.
Guitar playing is about playing the music you love and what feels good to you. It doesn’t matter if that’s a bob dylan song or a malmsteen virtuoso solo. Do what you love. My taste of music has also changed over the years. I used to be a big fan of Satriani, Scott Henderson, Pantera, Sepultura and I think that’s still awesome, but the last couple of years I’ve calmed down :) and I listen more to guys like Damien Rice, Ray La Montange and Ryan Adams. And it makes me happier than ever.
Mark just start playing a few minutes a day. Have fun and the magic will reappear!